Beautifuly, simple

The world taunts us. It taunts us with our fears it taunts us with our insecurities, it taunts us with the temptation of better, more, worth it…..

In our inadequacy we yearn to be something more something better something finished or at least complete
In our inability to finish strong we often weaken ourselves leaving our hearts vulnerable to the lies that surround us. I’ve gone to far, its to late now, im not strong enough, this isn’t for me.
And though we have heard and been taught of the simplicity of God’s love and his grace we often count it as for everyone but our selves
You see its not in our strength that God meets us and makes us complete. Its in our honest humble desire to be closer to him.
Do we know that its possible to desire God truly desire him when we are covered in our own messes completely saturated in our insecurities and unstable thoughts.
God doesn’t want us to come to him complete and put together rather vulnerable weak and willing to admit defeat.

The world taunts us, taunts us with insecurity
Who am I to believe I am less than what God has created? To love oneself is to love the most intimate part of God. The closest most beautiful characteristic We find in God is that which we learn to embrace in ourselves for we were made in God’s image. He doesn’t create mistakes, he doesn’t create ugly . every time we think less of ourselves we are diminishing the light God has placed in us to shine and the last thing the darkness we proceed into daily needs, is dim lighting flickering only growing strong every once in a good “feeling” . our light can not burn on feeling alone we must “Know” Knowing is a relentless pursuit of an open mind to God’s ways his thoughts about us not our own. Our strength cannot be weakened by our insecurities or assumption of our inadequacies , it’s quite opposite. We need our strength to battle these things, and Knowing, truly Knowing is half the battle.

The world taunts us with our fears. I don’t think we need to worry about our fear of the dark, of clowns, spiders, small places. I think we use such simple things to mask the deepest fears within us. The fear of rejection , loneliness, never being good enough, the fear of being too much, too little, the fear of what’s ahead or even worse the fear of what’s behind, the fear of repetitive sin, of people finally seeing that we fail. It goes all the way back to the beginning when Adam and eve hid from God in the garden Fearing God would see them as they were. I feel like we play the same game with God and each other. We try to mask ourselves in our strengths our joy our independence and the reality is were hiding something so great or sometimes so small, we fear what could happen if God saw, if “they” saw what your really hiding. Another great opportunity for the world to conquer what we know. When we live in fear we are not Knowing God, not completely for God says “DO NOT be afraid, for I am with you, don’t be discouraged for I am your God” Isaiah 41:10.

The world taunts us with more, better, worth it.
Our own selfish desires for something better, something more, something worth it, something consistent, something permanent, these desires are often the beginning of the self destruction of our hearts.
We feel if only we could have something tangible and consistent to hold onto that we would be ok. We always want more, more things, more time, more love. We are far to often unsatisfied with the simplicity of life and of God. If it were Gods will for any of those desires to be filled they would be. And yet we strain our hearts and minds so much trying to achieve something we can control. If we desired only to be set apart to know God more to learn to depend on his love alone, our souls would find peace our minds at ease, and we would rest untossled by the thought of what comes next. We must choose to find our relationship with God although complex beyond human understanding, also simple as in “seek first the kingdom, and all else will follow” Notice it doesn’t say seek first the kingdom then if your not happy seek everything else until whatever your lusting after has been fulfilled, then you’ll be happy. False! It is far more simple then we make it, Love God Love People.

I write this not on some high mountain top having lived and learned it all, rather a weakened broken spirit burdened by my own downfalls, tossed about by the storms that I too often bring upon myself. I screw up far more often than the ideal believer but it’s a beautiful thing to constantly find yourself at the feet of a father who loves you covered in my own regret sin, inadequacy and fear. It sounds so strange but how could I appreciate the cleanse my God gives me if not been first covered in filth. And day by day ill have less sin and burden to bring to God and more praises, and sanctity, but until then I must remain broken God holding the pieces together so as that I cant function without him, and that to me is beautiful, that for me is simple.